FW De Klerk – Just Go Quietly

Apartheid gave us this guy FW De Klerk, and we would like to give him back now please. He was our last white dictator. Now he has started the De Klerk Foundation and has a sidekick who tells us k*k. Can someone please get in touch with this guy and tell him: “We are not interested Mr. Ex-Dictator dude”.

Apparently he got the Nobel Peace prize with Nelson Mandela, because together they bought peace. WTF?! Nelson Mandela spent 27 years in jail and then, with help, convinced some severely pissed off freedom fighters to chill.

What did De Klerk do? Spend 27 years waxing his shiny bald head? De Klerk getting the Nobel Peace Prize with Mandela was like DJ Tbo Touch getting a SAMA award because he once play-listed a Lira song.

P.S. can we also get Bra Tbo Touch to change his name? Because ‘Touch’ is a stupid name for a DJ, but a lekker one for a pedophile. If you don’t know who Tbo Touch is, please slap yourself for being out of Touch. Puns for days.

I know Mandela needed someone in the apartheid system to make a change (CODESA, talks about talks, and what what) so thanks for not continuing apartheid Mr. de Klerk. But how grateful should we be for that? Imagine giving a rapist a prize because he stopped raping? Or giving a carjacker a prize because he stopped stealing cars? Or Justin Bieber a prize because he stopped singing … ok, that last one would make sense.

I would be fine with de Klerk keeping the prize, except now he’s telling us what he thinks. Turns out he really is a bald, brainless bigot.

He went on CNN and told the world that black people “were not disenfranchised” by the homeland vibes. Madness! What’s next? Nazis telling us about how the Holocaust was only bad for the really thin people (with respect to Jewish ous)?

Now his de Klerk Foundation, headed by some cheeseball called Dave Stewart is telling us about how they think affirmative action is a bad idea. Whoa! You seriously telling me we have the former leader of the white supremacist group called the National Party telling us what he thinks about affirmative action? What’s he going to do next, make me say ‘baas’?

Just because he looks like Dr. Phil’s evil brother doesn’t mean his opinion should have credibility. Yes, he has a right to say what he thinks. And I have a right to tell him to kiss my little puppet ass. FW De Klerk talking about Affirmative Action is like Julius Malema giving out recipes for salad.

When we’re thinking how to redress the economic inequality in SA, the very last person, after Moshe from Takalane Sesame, after Kenny Kunene the sushi king, even after Jub Jub, will be a former apartheid president.

Don’t get me wrong, South Africa is a country for everyone. I am sure apartheid presidents can have a role. He could get busy separating Jelly Babies into colour groups, or running torture camps for Survivor SA, or telling us exactly how they came up with the ridiculous difference between black, white and coloured.

But when it comes to affirmative action De Klerk is like a VHS tape: completely out of date. Except unlike FW de Klerk, VHS tapes are black and can actually do something useful.

Chester Missing is a political analyst on Late Nite News with Loyiso Gola on eNCA and etv.

  • Mariano Castrillon

    You are missing something Chester. When was the last time that a “black” dictator transferred power to another person, be it ” black” “white” or “yellow” ?

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001952217110 Russell Wayne Wright

      You’re the one missing the point Mariano

      • Mariano Castrillon


  • http://www.facebook.com/sarahgrn27 Sarah Greene

    at least under aparteid the country was ecomically viable, the trains ran on time the hospitals worked the schools worked, the ANC is a dictator ship as no other party is big enough to take power they stay in power all the time and give jobs to the click, under their leadership the country is worse off, South Africa is a multi cultural society so where do the blacks get off saying its for blacks only and they have a right to kill the whites no one has a right to kill anyone is a civilised society so if they want to be part of a democratic society maybe they should get thier own morals and behaviour in line with what is considered civilised because at the present time they are most certantly NOT!!!!!!

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001952217110 Russell Wayne Wright

      Sarah I think you might also be a little pissed if you were black and were forced to endure 40 years of discrimination to the extent that blacks have had to.

    • Mlamuli G

      Only a white person will say such things

  • Chillipeppa

    You are so wrong. Name me a single dictator who when he came to power held a referendum which voted him (and his party) out of office. Name me a single dictator who was quoted as saying” I am a man in a hurry to leave office”? Lose the race card here pal and concentrate on getting rid of apartheid/BEE or whatever you want to call it.

  • Pete

    Lose the race card – get rid of the current apartheid/bee/aa/ee rubbish which is hurting everything in S.A. The ANC got a perfect working country and look what they did to it. BTW – incase you have not noticed….those black VHS tapes have long gone and became defunct…..

    • http://twitter.com/mlungisidl Mlu

      oh perfect working country with 80% uneducated people, sidelined from economic activity, slavery, avg inflation of 9.8 in 1994 and 16.4 in 1991. You sound like a VHS tapethat has done exactly that. Bankrupt state.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001952217110 Russell Wayne Wright

    Chilipeppa called you “pal”…I think that means hes pissed at you.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001952217110 Russell Wayne Wright

    De Klerk has sod all credibility. None….and I’ve always felt he shouldn’t have received the Nobel prize. That’s rubbing salt into the wound.

  • Alan jack

    Clearly an American moron who actually does not know the history of South Africa, but not surprised as most Americans are just ignorant of all outside their little states? Moron read the history and you will find FW De Klerk ended Apartheid of white against black and freed a convicted Terrorist who actually planted bombs! Yes Mandela is a great statesman and deserved to be released. If he had been in the USA he would have had the death sentence. So you ignorant tosser look at your selves and ask what about racism in the USA? What about the “new apartheid” in South Africa where its job reservation as a matter of course. Maybe if you researched your piece a bit better we would grant you some sort of respect. Now you have just shown what your nation is like, a lot of inbred racist ignorant fat tossers.

    • http://twitter.com/mlungisidl Mlu

      No, he’s South African. Who’s ignorant now?

  • dave

    what racist shit is this? reporting this to the dmca for takedown. will agree with Sarah on this one !

By Chester Missing

Chester Missing Chester Missing is South Africa's hottest new political analyst. Conrad Koch is his sidekick. It's strange, but you'll laugh... a lot.

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