Capetonians Scientifically Proven To Feel Cold More Than Anyone Else On Earth

They’re not actually just whining about nothing

JOHANNESBURG – Research conducted at the Institute for Cold Experientials (ICE) has finally confirmed what thousands of Facebookers know to be true: when Capetonians are cold, they are colder than anyone else. “It’s a chemical reaction, so as soon as the temperature drops below 20, Capetonians feel it as at least 2 degrees colder than it really is,” Professor Uys elaborated.

This phenomenon would explain why the Capetonians are always the ones wearing more layers of warm clothing than humanly possible, buy more electric hot water bottles and microwavable heat pads, and are more likely to walk up to you and say “It’s cold”. It has also led to a strange mutation, a sub-species of Capetonians, who don’t feel the cold at all, who wear flip flops and shorts year round.

Unfortunately ICE has no immediate solution for this frankly annoying phenomenon. “All we can do is take every comment they make about the temperature with a pinch of salt,” Uys said, “Or just avoid them completely for the duration of winter.”